All posts filed under: relationship

Quotes from Donald Miller’s Scary Close


I read Scary Close a few weeks ago and enjoyed it immensely. I have never had the privilege of reading Donald’s other books, so I will leave the all the critical evaluation to those who’ve read them and how they compare to this one. But in this book, Donald leads in a conversation about his personal journey of painful and failed relationships. For most of his life, he had lived, pretending to be something he wasn’t, hoping to impress people in order for them to like him. But at age forty he began to discover the freedom of being himself and the rewards of taking of his masks. If you want intimacy in your relationship, a healthy mind, a strong family and a satisfying career, Donald invites your to drop the act, be yourself and connect with more people. In this post, I want to share a few quotes that really made this book stand out in a significant way. Enjoy! Distracting noises of insecurity: “Applause is a quick fix, and love is an acquired taste.” “You need …

Be hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise


A few days ago, I walked into my office and realized that I had two voice messages from the light flashing my office phone. I quickly pressed the button on the phone to retrieve the messages. As I listened to the second message, I recognized a familiar voice. It was Bob Kilpatrick. If you don’t know who Bob is, you ought to. He is not only a prolific singer songwriter with countless hits, an author, but also one the most down to earth, passionate for Jesus and funny guys on planet earth. He is a bundle of joy to be with. Around the time I got saved, Bob’s praise and worship songs were sung in every church. I remember leading the church in songs like, In my life be glorified. That one song was featured in almost every worship set. Long before I got to meet him, Bob’s words in songs took me to another place. A heavenly place. His words today, are still taking me same. Taking me places.  Heavenly places. In 2014, we had an opportunity to spend …

The Only black man in town


I am a missionary. My mission statement is, “God, send me anywhere, only go with me. Lay any burden on me, only sustain me. And sever any tie in my heart except the tie that binds my heart to Yours.” –David Livingston Well, I live and minister in the middle of nowhere. I usually refer to it as, “my ends of the earth.” For a long time, we were the only black family in town. Now, there is two other black families, I think. I find absolutely nothing wrong with that. We love everyone equally and expect the same. Besides the occasional stares, we love it here,. We are on a mission. We love our church as well, it is the most loving church in the world. We are proud to be their pastors. There is no other group of people I’d rather spend my time doing life with. Haven said that, when my youngest daughter was about 6, a kid in her class looked at her and said, “why are you so black?” Well, …

You are a dead man


But God came to Abimelek in a dream by night and said to him, “Behold, you are a dead man because of the woman whom you have taken, for she is another man’s wife. Genesis 20:3 Diabolical Disturbing Trend If this verse from Genesis chapter 20 does not put the fear of God in you, I don’t know what else would. There is something diabolically disturbing in desiring and wanting someone else’s spouse. Maybe it is the diabolical deception or the lustful pleasure, or the two joined that takes away any kind of common sense or the fear of God, to prevent one from committing such a selfish and wicked sin. We see it play out every day in the lives of the rich and famous, and the not so rich and famous. It’s portrayed in our favorite movies and TV Shows. Sadly, most of us have accepted it as a culture. And a lot of people don’t know, but by giving in to such sins, they expose themselves, or give themselves over to death. …

Covenant Friendship


Covenant friendship is one of heaven’s greatest blessings. I believe it was Michael Smith who said, “friends are friends forever if the Lord is the Lord of them.” We catch glimpses of it, between Ruth and Naomi. “Do not urge me to leave you or to return from following you. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried. May the Lord do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you.” (Ruth 1:16, 17).

7 Ways it Improve your Marriage right now


Take ownership and personal responsibility for all your actions. The easiest thing to do when your relationship goes sour is to play the blame game. This only leads to more headache. The godly thing to do is just own up to your personal faults and everything will begin to fall in place. Pray, pray, pray! Jesus is able to make it work A lot of marriages fail because too much trust is placed on marriage counseling. As good as counseling is – (you should get it at all cost), you will need God to work in it. Also, marriages fail because we expect our counselor to fix our partner. God is the only one who can do stuff like that. The sooner you realize that neither you nor your counselor can fix your spouse, prayer will become your priority. Sometimes we just give up before truly seeking his help. Until we can all realize that he has the power to fix things, even the most difficult things, we may never experience divine breakthroughs in our …

Charity Begins at Home


A Paraphrase of 1 Corinthians 13  Author Unknown and altered by J. Yardy Though in the glamour of the public eye I sway the emotions of many by my oratory, or my silver singing, or by my skillful playing, or by my winning personality, and then go home and gripe because things don’t go m way, I am become a sounding brass or a tingling cymbal. And though I am able to impress others with my vast knowledge of the deep things of the Word of God in Bible Studies and prayer groups, and though I am able to accomplish mighty things through faith so that I become famous in the church as a remover of mountains, and have not love that reads the deep longings of the hearts around the family circle, and removes the barriers that grow up in shy and tender hearts, I am nothing at all. And though in glamour of public praise I bestow my goods to feed the poor, and though I win the name and fame of the …

5 demons you will have to fight as long as you are married


I believe in happily ever after. But the road to get there is not necessarily paved with gold. “Any mature, spiritually sensitive view of marriage must have at its foundation, mature love and not romanticism.” True marriage thrives on a willingness to work hard and a resolve to fight for all the promises that marriage holds. In this post, I highlight five obstacles to happily ever after: 1. Unhappiness A sense of happiness is very essential to the overall health of your marriage. Without it, the doors swing wide open to infidelity, anger, and divorce. The problem with happiness though, it comes and it goes. Finding a way to bring it back by intentionally working on the things that make you happy is key to a successful marriage. Gary Thomas asked a very powerful question in his book Sacred Marriage that I think is a starting point to understanding happiness in marriage. He asked, “What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy?” I believe if we are seeking holiness in our marriage it will produce the happiness we so …

5 ways to Rekindle the flame in the ashes of your love life


  As we approach Valentines Day, I would urge you to take advantage of the opportunity to make thing better in your relationship with you spouse. Here are 10 Simple, yet powerful ways you can rekindle the ashes of your love life: 1. Address every unresolved issue in your relationship I understand that women feel very deeply about things, but men do too. It is important to deal with hurts and disappointments as promptly as possible. If we allow the sun to go down on our wrath, we run the risk of opening the door to resentment and bitterness. This is never a good place to dwell in a relationship.. It is important, therefore, to resolve every conflict. Repent and forgive. 2. Focus on the little things Sometimes in life the things that matter most are small things. Little gestures of kindness. Little acts of grace. Little moments of tenderness. Little sacrificial service. All these can add up to spark an unstoppable flame. It really doesn’t have to be a diamond ring – I’m sure that wouldn’t hurt, cuz …